I Keep Waiting

May 2, 2019



You know that feeling after you have had a really good cry when you kind of just stare off into oblivion with a stuffy nose and swollen eyes? For me, that’s how I would describe “waiting”. Scripture uses a metaphor that fits so well for me to describe the continual waiting seasons of my life: “But I have calmed and quieted my soul, like a weaned child with its mother; like a weaned child is my soul within me” (Psalm 131:2). I remember when my sisters weaned their babies from their bottles. At first, they cried. The babies, that is. Quite a bit. They were so fussy… and I’m sure they just wanted to give in and provide calming and comforting sustenance for their baby. But they persevered. Soon, their fussy babies never asked for the bottle again. I remember watching the children get to the point where they cried so hard for the bottle that they would just sit and stare with their puffy faces and snotty noses. The child finally succumbed to the waiting. The waiting in the weaning. I’ve learned that life is just a series of waiting moments: waiting to grow up, waiting to graduate, waiting to get married, waiting to have children, waiting for THE phone call, waiting for the Lord to be my very present help in time of need, waiting for the Lord to come through on His promises to satisfy my hungry soul, waiting for the adoption to be finalized, waiting for the two pink lines that never come, waiting for the messiness I’ve caused in a relationship to be redeemed, waiting. Waiting. Waiting…. And in all this waiting I see how it’s working together for my good. I wait on the Lord. For His redemption, for His second coming, for eternity.

But in the waiting, I know there is a weaning process from the things of this earth that I have believed, and been deceived to believe, would comfort or satisfy. Life is a series of waiting moments, weaning moments, all for my eternal good and His glory. What am I currently waiting on? I’m currently waiting on a phone call that will determine whether or not our sweet girl will become a Saylor. I’m waiting on the Lord to restore what I, a ravenous locust, have destroyed in my sinfulness. I’m waiting to be weaned of my sinful desires and for Him to change my affections to hate my sin and love Him as He ought to be loved. I’m waiting on Him to answer prayers for my marriage. I’m waiting for Him to come riding on the clouds and to drive out the darkness for all eternity. I’m waiting.

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